Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
