i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize