I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
