Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
