I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
