You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
