Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
