Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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