She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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