she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
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