lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize