Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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