somebody snuck up and got me drunk
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
