She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Randomize
