Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
