i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
