I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
