vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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