Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
