I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize