Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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