we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
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