So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
