Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
