Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
