Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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