Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
