my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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