maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize