Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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