Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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