Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
