So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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