i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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