Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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