i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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