YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Randomize
