my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
