some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
do herpes really smell.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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