I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
