I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
You ever have a fart follow you around?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
