This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
