I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
i out mim tonsoeep
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
