Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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