we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
