i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
