So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
