the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
