Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
