remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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